LAUGHTER’S THE BEST MEDICINE

A Strange Man
A man walked into a psychiatrist’s office with a fried egg on the top of his head and a strip of bacon over each ear. The psychiatrist decided to proceed with a normal greeting. There was no point getting the fellow upset.

- “What can I do for you?” the psychiatrist asked. The man smiled pleasantly.

- “Doc”, he answered, “I’m worried about my brother”.

Traffic Camera
A man was driving through town, when he saw the flash of a traffic camera. He figured that his picture had been taken for exceeding the limit, even though he knew that he was not speeding.

Just to be sure, he went around the block and passed the same spot, driving even more slowly, but again the camera flashed.

Now he began to think that this was quite funny, so he drove even slower as he passed the area again, but the traffic camera again flashed.

He tried a fourth time with the same result.

He did this a fifth time and was now laughing when the camera flashed as he rolled past, this time at a snail’s pace.

Two weeks later, he got five tickets in the mail for driving without a seat belt.

Lost in Translation
The Smith family was very proud that their ancestors had come over on the Mayflower, so they hired best-selling author Frank McCourt to look up and write a book about their family history.

Horror of horrors! They discovered that great uncle Fess had died in the electric chair for committing a murder. They were devastated.

They didn’t want that in the book, but they didn’t want to leave him out either.

McCourt said, “Leave it to me.”

When the book came out, the section about Uncle Fess read like this:

- “He was a man who occupied a great seat. He was attached to his position very firmly. His death came as a great shock.”

Girls Are So Demanding
A 10-year-old girl was walking down the street when a big man on a big-old motorcycle pulls up beside her and says...

- “Hey little girl, do you want to go for a ride?”

- “NO!” says the little girl as she keeps on walking.

The motorcyclist pulls up beside her again and says,

- “Hey kid, I will give you $10 if you hop on the back.”

- “NO!” said the little girl and proceeded down the street a little quicker.

The motorcyclist pulls up to the little girl again and says...

- “Okay kid, I will give you $20 and a BIG bag of candy if you hop on the back of my bike for a ride.”

At this point the little girl turns to him and screams angrily,

- “Look Dad, YOU bought a Honda instead of a Harley, so, YOU ride it!”