Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Automobiles
They're big, expensive, and breath-taking marvels of engineering, but to view automobiles purely as transportation is to miss their essence. Cars are the first true freedom of the adolescent, and throughout our adult years they continue to represent escape, the ability to speed away from responsibilities and cares. It's no wonder Detroit constantly plays upon this theme in its advertising — they know it sells!
Automobiles are both a means of getting from one place to another and a place in themselves, making them both conveyance and cocoon. We sing along to the radio in them, something we'd likely not dare to do at home. Our first passionate encounters take place in them. And when all other resting places fail us, we sleep in them. Automobiles are as much about private inviolate space as they are about transportation.
The importance of automobiles in our lives secures their place in the lore of our times. They are both practical and whimsical, reliable and frightening, mundane and exciting, necessary and exotic, commonplace and mysterious. They are, in other words, the mechanical expression of humanity.
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Most Lethal Food
A dietician was once addressing a large audience in Chicago.
"The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago.
Red meat is awful. Vegetables can be disastrous, and none of us realises the germs in our drinking water.
But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all eat it. Can anyone here tell me what lethal product I'm referring to?"
"You, sir, in the first row, please give us your idea."
The man lowered his head and said, "Wedding cake."
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Tips & Humor
TIPS OF THE WEEK - THE WORD “SICK” :
If you feel sick,
you feel physically or mentally ill; not healthy
or well.
To feel sick - to feel unwell or ill.
I went home early from work because I felt sick.
To get sick - to throw up; to vomit
I got sick on the plane because of the turbulence.
To call in sick - to tell your employer that you're not coming to work because you don't feel well.
Betty called in sick three days last week. She had the flu.
I went home early from work because I felt sick.
To get sick - to throw up; to vomit
I got sick on the plane because of the turbulence.
To call in sick - to tell your employer that you're not coming to work because you don't feel well.
Betty called in sick three days last week. She had the flu.
I was
as sick as a dog. I was in bed with a fever of 42 degrees.
To be as
sick as a dog - to be very, very sick.
HUMOR :
No Respect
- My boss was complaining in a staff meeting the other day that he wasn't getting any respect. Later that morning he went out and got a small sign that read, "I'M THE BOSS"! He then taped it to his office door. When he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note to the sign that said:

- "Your wife called, she wants her sign back”!
Tuesday, January 08, 2013
Saturday, December 15, 2012
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Diamonds are for farting!
A Lady walks into Tiffany's... She looks around, spots a beautiful diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to look more closely, she unexpectedly farts...
Very embarrassed she looks around nervously to see if anyone noticedd her little woops and prays that a salesperson was not anywhere near...
As she turns around, her worst nightmare materializes in the form of a salesman standing right behind her...
Good looking as well... cool as a cucumber, he displays all of the qualities one would expect of a professional in a store like Tiffany's
He polite greets the lady with,
- "good day, madam... how may we help you today"?
Blushing and uncomfortable, but still hoping that the salesman somehow missed her little "incident", she asks,
- "Sir, what is the price of this lovely bracelet?"
He answers,
- " Madam... if you farted just looking at it - you're going to shit when I tell you the price.
Very embarrassed she looks around nervously to see if anyone noticedd her little woops and prays that a salesperson was not anywhere near...
As she turns around, her worst nightmare materializes in the form of a salesman standing right behind her...
Good looking as well... cool as a cucumber, he displays all of the qualities one would expect of a professional in a store like Tiffany's
He polite greets the lady with,
- "good day, madam... how may we help you today"?
Blushing and uncomfortable, but still hoping that the salesman somehow missed her little "incident", she asks,
- "Sir, what is the price of this lovely bracelet?"
He answers,
- " Madam... if you farted just looking at it - you're going to shit when I tell you the price.
Wednesday, December 05, 2012
Camping
An illiterate father with his educated son went on a camping trip, they set up their tent and feel asleep.
Some hour later, father wakes his son and asks:
- "Look up to the sky and tell me what do you see?
- Son: I see Millions of stars...
- Father: What does that tell you?
- Son: Astronomically it tells there are millions of galaxies and planets up there...
- Father: Slaps the son hard and says, "Idiot, someone has stolen our tent!"
Monday, December 03, 2012
TIPS OF THE DAY – PREPOSITIONS
ACROSS - Indica movimento
ou extensão por cima de um objeto, de um lado
para outro. – Através de.
AFTER - Depois de, após, atrás de, em busca ou no encalço de, à maneira de, abaixo de (graduação),
AGAINST - Contra, em contato com, para, (em previsão de).
e.g.: -
He lives across the street.
She swam across the river.
AFTER - Depois de, após, atrás de, em busca ou no encalço de, à maneira de, abaixo de (graduação),
e.g.: -
After a storm
comes a calm.
The letter
arrived the day after.
Peter went after his brothers.
The policeman
ran after the crook.
A painting after
Rembrandt.
A captain comes after a major.
AGAINST - Contra, em contato com, para, (em previsão de).
e.g.: - Let’s all fight against tyranny.
The public opinion was against Bill Clinton.
She was
leaning against the
wall.
We must
save against bad days in the future.
Friday, November 23, 2012
Thursday, November 08, 2012
Wednesday, November 07, 2012
Monday, November 05, 2012
Friday, November 02, 2012
Why Do Couples Fight ?
When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive. So, I took her to a petrol pump And then the fight started.
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?"
It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation."Somewhere I've not been in a long time." So I took her to the kitchen. Then the fight started.
My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, 'What's on TV?' I said, 'Dust.' And then the fight started.
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 100 in about 3 seconds.' I bought her a weighing scale. And then the fight started.
Thursday, November 01, 2012
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
A lovely short story
After losing his parents, this 3 year old orangutan was so depressed he wouldn't eat and didn't respond to any medical treatments. The veterinarians thought he would surely die from sadness.
The zoo keepers found an old sick dog on the grounds in the park at the zoo where the orangutan lived and took the dog to the animal treatment center.
The dog arrived at the same time the orangutan was there being treated. The 2 lost souls met and have been inseparable ever since. The orangutan found a new reason to live and each day always tries his best to be a good companion to his new found friend. They are together 24 hours a day in all their activities.
They live in Northern California where swimming is their favorite past time, although Roscoe (the orangutan) is a little afraid of the water and needs his friend's help to swim. Together they have discovered the joy and laughter in life and the value of friendship. They have found more than a friendly shoulder to lean on.
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Teaching Tips & Ideas

SEVERE LINGUISTICS DIFFICULTIES – TH – Sounds – Silent Letters
Many students use to substitute an “S sound”, a “D sound” or a “Z sound” for the TH sound. Though there are all kinds of exercises for the TH sounds, here’s my favorite. “Three –Thousand –Three – Hundred –Thirty –Three -Trees”. If every student can say this sentence correctly, we feel that they have more or less mastered TH sounds and are able to go to other subjects.
Another common error is the pronunciation of silent letters: The L in Walk, Talk, Chalk, the T in Listen, and Castle, the B in Climb and Lamb are frequent but the silent letter which is most usually pronounced is the W in the word ANSWER. Here’s what I believe to be the cure for that sort of error. The drill is a conversation between two people and it should be read first by the teacher then by the class - divided into two groups - then, by two students then by individuals. If repeated a great many times it will sound kind of stupid but on the other hand it is quite presumable that the “W sound” will be gone forever. H.C.
Here’s The Drill:
A – Will you come to the movies, Sir? What is your answer, Sir?
B – Yes, I will come to the movies, Sir! That’s my answer, Sir!
A – There’s “Singin’ in the Rain” on screen and, Sir!
B – Sandwiches and Popcorn and ice cold Coke, Sir ? Yes, I will come
to the movies, Sir!
A – Is this your final answer, Sir?
B - Yes, this is my answer, Sir! My very final answer, Sir!
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