Happy Holidays

Think it over...!

Diamonds are for farting!

A Lady walks into Tiffany's... She looks around, spots a beautiful diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to look more closely, she unexpectedly farts...

Very embarrassed she looks around nervously to see if anyone noticedd her little woops and prays that a salesperson was not anywhere near...

As she turns around, her worst nightmare materializes in the form of a salesman standing right behind her...

Good looking as well... cool as a cucumber, he displays all of the qualities one would expect of a professional in a store like Tiffany's

He polite greets the lady with,

- "good day, madam... how may we help  you today"?

Blushing and uncomfortable, but still hoping that the salesman somehow missed her little "incident", she asks,

- "Sir, what is the price of this lovely bracelet?"
 
He answers,

- " Madam... if you farted  just looking at it - you're going to shit when I tell you the price.

Camping

An illiterate father with his educated son went on a camping trip, they set up their tent and feel asleep.
Some hour later, father wakes his son and asks:
- "Look up to the sky and tell me what do you see?
- Son: I see Millions of stars...
- Father: What does that tell you?
- Son: Astronomically it tells there are millions of galaxies and planets up there...
- Father: Slaps the son hard and says, "Idiot, someone has stolen our tent!"

TIPS OF THE DAY – PREPOSITIONS

ACROSS - Indica movimento ou extensão por cima de um objeto, de um lado para outro. – Através de.

                        e.g.: -   He lives across the street.

                                   She swam across the river.

AFTER - Depois de, após, atrás de, em busca ou no encalço de, à maneira de, abaixo de (graduação),

     e.g.: -   After a storm comes a calm.

                                   The letter arrived the day after.

                                   Peter went after his brothers.

                                   The policeman ran after the crook.

                                   A painting after Rembrandt.

                                   A captain comes after a major.

AGAINST - Contra, em contato com, para, (em previsão de).

                        e.g.: - Let’s all fight against tyranny.

                                 The public opinion was against Bill Clinton.

                                 She was leaning against the wall.

                                 We must save against bad days in the future.